Monday, January 5, 2009

I Remember ( by Beenie Girl)

I know I haven’t been blogging for a little while, so this is my first one for 2009. You know usually at the start of a new year most people are pensive, introspective, reflective and many other ‘ives’. For me, when a new year starts it plagues me with memories of people I have lost - of two people in particular - and it usually makes the start of the year bittersweet for me. I rang in the New Year by myself this year and I think it made it a little bit more difficult since I did not have much to distract my brain from these troublesome memories. The song says memories don’t leave like people do, and it is so true. Sometimes I feel like it would be easier if I didn’t remember; if I could somehow blank out of my brain the entire event. I just wish that old acquaintance could be forgot, and never brought to mind. But you know it’s funny … why is it that we can never seem to forget the things we really want to. And yet the things we should remember we tend to forget? That’s the thing about memories, you don’t have a remote control for them. It was a struggle to even write this blog because, even as I wrote, memories were pressing the play button all the time in my head, and in my head playing over and over my ultimate feeling sad song “I remember when my heart broke … I remember when I said I hated you … so saaad and lonely.” But you know even while I was rolling around in my big ‘sad puddle’, making myself a little bit more comfortable, I read a lesson in my devotional yesterday entitled “When things go bad.” It encouraged me to strengthen myself in the Lord when I am feeling discouraged, sad, depressed by doing two things:
1. Remember the good things God has done in the past.
2. Remember what God has promised to do in the future.

There was that word again REMEMBER.

Ok I think I get it now, I am trying to forget, when I should be trying to remember … Remember that although 2008 was such a rough year in many respects, some parts of the year I wish I could just erase, but there we sooo many good times as well. Remember that while I have lost loved ones there are those who are still with me who I can love and appreciate now. Remember that God is always able and He is always there.

1 comment:

  1. :( I know the feeling. I hope we continue to remember in 09 that the ones we have around us are special.

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